Head table or sweetheart table? Who sits where at each

The difference between a head table and a sweetheart table, the traditional seating order, which side each of you sits on, and how to choose between them.

The short answer

A sweetheart table seats just the two of you; a head table seats you with your wedding party, traditionally in a row facing the guests. At a head table the couple sits in the middle, with the maid of honor and best man beside you and the rest of the wedding party alternating outwards. Traditionally the bride sits on the groom's right, but there is no rule that matters today. Choose whichever side keeps you both in the best light for photos.

Head table or sweetheart table?

Head table and sweetheart table compared: Who sits there, The couple only, The couple and the wedding party; Room needed, One small table, A long table, often on a riser; Partners of the wedding party, Sit with them at nearby tables, Traditionally at guest tables, which can leave them alone; Best for, Couples who want a moment together; large wedding parties, Small wedding parties who are close; a formal feel; The catch, You may feel separated from your friends, Long tables are hard to talk across, and partners notice being left out.

Seating order at a head table

The classic arrangement comes from Emily Post's Etiquette (1922). The bride sits "on his right", beside the groom, with the maid of honor on the groom's other side and the best man on the bride's other side. Bridesmaids and ushers then alternate outwards from there.

Which side of the sweetheart table

The same tradition puts the bride on the groom's right. The more useful question is practical:

Where the sweetheart or head table goes

Centre it along the long wall with the best view of the room, and put it where every guest can see you during the speeches. Keep the parents' tables closest to it, at equal distances if parents are divorced (see where divorced parents sit). The rest of the room is planned around it, and the wedding table calculator removes the head or sweetheart table's guests from the count for you.

Who sits at the head table at a wedding?

The couple and the wedding party, traditionally the maid of honor and best man beside the couple and the other attendants alternating outwards. Some couples add partners of the wedding party, or parents.

What side does the bride sit on at the sweetheart table?

Traditionally on the groom's right, which is the guests' left. Today most couples decide based on photos and how the room is laid out.

Do parents sit at the head table?

Not traditionally. Parents usually host their own tables near the couple. Some couples with a small wedding party seat parents at the head table instead.