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What the paebaek is, why dates and chestnuts get thrown, what the mothers' hanbok colours mean, and how a modern Korean wedding hall day runs.
Most Korean weddings today take place in a wedding hall and look broadly Western, with a white dress, a short ceremony and a meal, but several traditions remain. The mothers of the couple wear hanbok in contrasting colours, blue for the groom's mother and red for the bride's. Many couples then change into traditional dress for the paebaek, where they bow to their elders and try to catch dates and chestnuts thrown into the bride's skirt, a wish for children. Guests usually give cash in an envelope.
Korean wedding traditions then and now: Venue, The bride's family home, Usually a wedding hall, hotel or other venue; Bride's dress, Hwarot, a ceremonial robe, White gown, with hanbok for the paebaek; Mothers, Traditional dress, Honju hanbok: blue for the groom's mother, red for the bride's; Paebaek, Held days after the wedding with the groom's family, Often held at the venue after the ceremony, sometimes with both families, and optional; Gifts, Goods and household items, Cash in envelopes.
The pyebaek (also spelled paebaek) is a family ceremony in which the newlyweds show respect to their elders. Traditionally it took place a few days after the wedding, when the bride was formally received by her husband's family. Today it is usually held in a private room at the venue after the main ceremony, and many couples now include both families.
Hanbok is traditional Korean dress. For the paebaek, brides traditionally wear the hwarot or wonsam, colourful ceremonial robes, and grooms wear a formal robe and hat. At the main ceremony, the most visible hanbok belong to the two mothers. Korea.net explains that, following yin and yang, the groom's mother wears shades of blue and the bride's mother shades of red. At many ceremonies the two mothers walk in together and light candles to open the wedding.
Korean weddings are known for being efficient. Popular halls are booked back to back, and couples compete to reserve them, sometimes a year ahead. A typical day:
Korean guests almost always give cash. According to Korea.net, guests give money in envelopes based on the cost of the meal and how close they are to the couple. Amounts vary by relationship and region; ask a friend or relative for local norms. For how gift customs compare elsewhere, see who gives gifts at weddings around the world.
A fully traditional ceremony, called a jeontong honrye, is rarer but still chosen by some couples, and is often performed at folk villages or cultural venues. It includes bows between the bride and groom, shared drinks of wine from a gourd split in two, and a pair of wooden geese representing lifelong faithfulness. Couples who want a taste of tradition often keep the paebaek and drop the rest.
Korean American and other diaspora couples often hold the paebaek before the reception, or on a separate day with close family only, while the main wedding follows local customs. If you're blending traditions, how to plan a multicultural wedding covers how couples fit two sets of customs into one day. For a wider view of pre- and post-ceremony rituals, see what happens after a wedding ceremony around the world.
It is the traditional Korean ceremony in which the newlyweds bow to their parents and elders and receive their blessing. The name refers to the offerings presented to the elders.
They symbolise children. The parents toss them during the paebaek and the couple try to catch them in the bride's skirt; the number caught is jokingly said to predict how many children they'll have.
Smart, formal clothes, as for most weddings. Hanbok is usually worn only by the couple's close family, especially the mothers.
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