Loading Forever Farrah…
Receiving lines, tea ceremonies, the hora, money spraying, the zaffa, the vidaai and the send-off. What follows the vows in different cultures, compared.
After the vows, almost every culture moves to a shared meal and a celebration, but what happens in between varies. Western couples often greet guests in a receiving line and leave under thrown rice or bubbles. Jewish couples spend a few minutes alone before the hora. Chinese couples serve tea to their elders, Korean couples bow to theirs in the pyebaek, Yoruba guests spray money on the dancing couple, Arab families escort them in a zaffa, and a Hindu bride's family says goodbye in the vidaai.
What follows the ceremony, by culture: Receiving line, US, UK and other Western weddings, Hosts and couple greet every guest; Yichud and the hora, Jewish weddings, Couple alone briefly, then a circle dance with the couple lifted on chairs; Tea ceremony, Chinese families, Couple serve tea to elders and receive blessings; Pyebaek, Korean families, Couple bow to parents, who toss dates and chestnuts; Money spraying, Yoruba and other Nigerian weddings, Guests shower the dancing couple with notes; Zaffa, Lebanon, Syria, Palestine, Egypt and other Arab countries, Drums, music and dancers escort the couple; Ceilidh, Scotland, Group dancing to a live band, with a caller teaching the steps; Vidaai or doli, North India and the diaspora, The bride's farewell to her family; Send-off, Many Western weddings, Guests throw rice, birdseed or petals, or blow bubbles.
Emily Post says a receiving line isn't required, but the couple should greet and thank every guest, and a line is the surest way to do it at a large wedding. Traditionally the host (often the bride's mother) stands first, followed by the parents and the couple. It happens either as guests leave the ceremony or when the couple reach the reception. For what comes next, see wedding reception order of events, and if there's a wait, the gap between the ceremony and reception.
In many Jewish weddings the couple go straight from the chuppah to yichud, a short time alone in a private room. The festive meal that follows, the seudat mitzvah, is itself a religious obligation. The Reform movement's guide describes the hora, the circle dance where the couple are often lifted up on chairs.
In traditional Chinese weddings, the couple serve tea to their elders, who give blessings and gifts in return, and the evening brings a banquet of several courses. Traditionally the bride returned to visit her parents' home on the third day of marriage. See what happens at a Chinese tea ceremony.
The Korean pyebaek was traditionally held a few days after the wedding with family only; today it's often held on the day. The couple make a deep bow to the groom's parents, who then toss dates and chestnuts for the bride to catch in her skirt. Each one caught stands for a future child.
At Yoruba weddings, money spraying means guests shower notes over the couple as they dance. It began as a way of honouring praise singers and spread to weddings and other celebrations. In a Yoruba traditional wedding, an alaga (a host and praise singer) runs the proceedings, and the celebration often carries on into an owambe party. Other cultures have their own version: in the money dance, guests pay to dance with the bride or groom.
The zaffa is a wedding march of drums, horns and dancers found across the Arab world, including Lebanon, Palestine and Syria. The word means to escort. It leads the couple into the celebration, which usually continues with a party and dinner.
In Scotland, many couples hire a band for an evening cèilidh. The dances are done in couples or groups, and because many guests are beginners, a caller usually teaches the steps before each dance. The Royal Scottish Country Dance Society explains the format.
The vidaai (also called the doli) is the bride's farewell to her family at the end of a Hindu or Sikh wedding. In Punjabi weddings, she throws puffed rice over her head as a wish for her parents' good fortune, and relatives throw coins after the procession as she leaves. It's often the most emotional moment of the day. See what to expect at an Indian wedding.
The wedding reception article notes the old custom of throwing rice or birdseed, a symbol of abundance, at the departing couple. Bubbles and bells are modern alternatives, and many venues now specify what can be thrown. Traditionally, guests stay until the couple leave.
Loading Forever Farrah…