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By Forever Farrah Published 2026-09-17.
Why couples marry more than once, from France's civil-first law to traditional and white weddings in Ghana and Nigeria, Indian multi-day events and Korean pyebaek.
Couples hold more than one wedding ceremony for three main reasons: the law recognises one ceremony and faith or family asks for another; families have customs that sit alongside a religious service; or a wedding is a series of rituals spread over several days. France requires a civil marriage before any religious one, many Ghanaian and Nigerian couples hold a traditional ceremony and a church "white wedding", and Indian and Korean weddings often include several events. For guests, it mostly means reading each invitation carefully.
In some countries only a civil ceremony makes a marriage legal, so couples who also want a religious wedding hold two.
France is the classic example. Under French law, only a civil marriage performed by a civil officer, usually the mayor or a deputy at the town hall (mairie), is legally valid. Religious weddings are not recognised by law, and the civil wedding must come first. Article 433-21 of the French penal code makes it an offence for a minister of religion to habitually perform religious marriages without being shown proof of the civil marriage. So a French couple who want a church wedding typically go to the mairie first, sometimes the same day, sometimes days or weeks earlier.
Several other countries also give legal effect only to civil marriage, and the rules differ widely. If you're invited to a wedding abroad, the invitation will usually make clear which event is which.
In much of West Africa, a marriage joins two families as much as two people, and the families' customary rites come alongside, not instead of, a church or mosque wedding.
Ghana. Ghanaian law recognises customary marriage, ordinance marriage (which includes church weddings registered under the Marriages Act) and marriage under Islamic law, as the Daily Graphic explains in a lawyer's column on the difference. A traditional or customary marriage is a legal marriage in its own right. Many couples still hold both: in another Graphic article a lawyer notes that people often marry under customary law first before going to church or a registry to marry under the ordinance. The customary ceremony, often called the engagement, is a family event with gifts presented to the bride's family; the white wedding follows the familiar church-and-reception shape.
Nigeria. Nigeria has hundreds of ethnic groups, each with its own customs, so there's no single "Nigerian traditional wedding". Among the Igbo, for example, the traditional marriage (igba nkwu) involves the groom's family meeting the bride's family's requirements and the bride finding and offering palm wine to the groom, as described in Wikipedia's overview of Igbo traditional marriage. Yoruba traditional weddings have their own sequence. Many Christian couples then hold a church wedding, and some a registry or court ceremony too. The details depend entirely on the families involved.
Some traditions were never a single event. Rituals that belong to different stages, families or groups of guests are spread over days.
Indian weddings. South Asian weddings differ hugely by region, language, faith and family, so there's no fixed list. Many North Indian Hindu and Sikh families hold pre-wedding events such as a mehndi (henna) evening, a sangeet (music and dance) night and a haldi (turmeric paste) ceremony, then the wedding itself, then a reception; see Wikipedia's overview of Punjabi wedding traditions for one regional example. Weddings from other regions or faiths may have quite different rituals, and families choose which ones to include.
Korean pyebaek. Most Korean weddings today take place in a wedding hall in Western-influenced dress. Pyebaek is a separate, smaller family ritual in which the couple change into hanbok and bow to their elders, who may toss jujubes and chestnuts, symbols of children, for the bride to catch in her skirt. Korea.net, the Korean government's official site, describes it as affirming the bond between the two families, and notes that it is now optional. Traditionally it was for the groom's family, and today it is often held straight after the main ceremony, with close family only.
Chinese, Vietnamese and Jewish weddings have their own paired or staged rituals too, such as a tea ceremony with elders or, in Jewish tradition, the betrothal and marriage blessings that were once separate events and are now joined in one ceremony.
| Pattern | Example | Which one is legal | Who attends |
|---|---|---|---|
| Civil then religious | France | The civil ceremony at the town hall | Often family and witnesses at the mairie; wider guests at the religious ceremony and reception |
| Customary plus church | Ghana, Nigeria | Depends on country and registration; customary marriage is legal in Ghana | Customary rites often family-focused; white wedding often larger |
| Multi-day rituals | Many Indian weddings | Depends on local law and registration | Varies by event; some are close family only |
| Main ceremony plus family ritual | Korean pyebaek | The registered marriage | Pyebaek is usually close family only |
Read each invitation. Being invited to one event doesn't mean you're invited to all of them. A civil ceremony or a pyebaek may be family-only by design, not a snub.
Dress for each event. A traditional ceremony may have its own colours or fabric; at many Nigerian weddings, families pick a shared fabric for guests, called aso ebi. A town hall ceremony may be smart day wear, the religious wedding more formal. Ask the couple or a family member if you're unsure; they'll be glad you asked.
Give one gift. Unless a custom clearly calls for something at a specific event, one gift for the marriage is plenty, even if you attend three events.
Plan travel and time off. Multi-day weddings, or a civil and religious wedding weeks apart, can mean two trips. RSVP to each event separately if asked.
For gift and dress customs by culture, see wedding guest etiquette around the world, and for one country in depth, Japanese wedding etiquette for guests. If you're the couple, a guest list that tracks who is invited to which event saves a lot of confusion; Forever Farrah lets you do that and collect RSVPs per event.
Seating a multicultural guest list? See how Matchmaker seats families together automatically.
Yes, for the marriage to be legal. Only a civil marriage performed by a civil officer is recognised, and it must come before any religious ceremony.
Customary marriage is one of the forms of marriage recognised by Ghanaian law. Many couples still also hold a church wedding, which is registered as an ordinance marriage.
Usually not. One gift for the marriage is standard. If a specific custom involves giving at a particular event, such as cash at a tea ceremony, the family will usually tell you.
Many of these ceremonies are small by tradition, such as a town hall wedding, a family rite or a pyebaek. Being invited to the main celebration is the usual invitation for friends.
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